Heard that they've gotten the lawyer's letter prepared already. heard that Danny said he doesn't care if I'm not coming to work but I must at least come back to settle everything. What is there to settle? Work goes on as per normal with or without me. It's the same thing what. Rena and Sharol always say they don't understand what could be taking so long for my work to be done right? Means that they understand how my work goes and thus should be able to delegate the correct duties to whoever and whomever is most appropiate right? So what is there to settle? I'm not going back. No way am I going to put myself in a position where I will be insulted, threatened and verbally abused. I have nothing to hide. This company still owes me my annual leave, my one month's salary(which I've exchanged for my one month's notice, but since they wanna sue me means they want me to go back and work is it? What's their purpose in sueing me I wonder?), plus my confirmation letter. Why is it this company does not give us a copy of the contract we have signed? Should I, as a legally binded person, be entitled to the right of having a copy of the contract I signed on? The more I think about it, the angrier I get. This is silly. Again and again I ask myself. What right does this company have, to not pay me OT, to ask me to come back on Sundays to work, to push all the blame to me when things crop up? What gives them the right to issue me a lawyer's letter even if I have been Missing in Action? Please show me the original contract I've signed on. What can they get out of me? One month's salary?

Am I Evil? Ripped from Justin's blog, ehehehehe

I am 37% evil.




I could go either way. I have sinned quite a bit but I still have a bit of room for error. My life is a tug of war between good and evil.


Are you evil? find out at Hilowitz.com

New Layout

Downloaded this Gloomy layout just now. Trying to get used to it. Hehe.

They tried calling my home again today. Also tried to disturb Shirley. Sick. I went to my great-grandma's 90th birthday celebration today! So nice to see my relatives again, happy.

Tired. Sorry Mandy, came back too late to call you in time. How are we gonna run tomorrow morning if we didn't settle on a timing??? Think have to shift to Tuesday already... >.<

Ok. feel shitty, going to bed, niteZ.

Words that describe my feelings now

FEAR
Main Entry: 1fear Pronunciation: 'firFunction: verbtransitive senses1 archaic : FRIGHTEN2 archaic : to feel fear in (oneself)3 : to have a reverential awe of 4 : to be afraid of : expect with alarmintransitive senses : to be afraid or apprehensive- fear·er noun

TRAUMA
Main Entry: trau·ma Pronunciation: 'trau-m&, 'tro-Function: nounInflected Form(s): plural traumas also trau·ma·ta /-m&-t&amp;/Etymology: Greek traumat-, trauma wound, alteration of trOma; akin to Greek titrOskein to wound, tetrainein to pierce -- more at THROW1 a : an injury (as a wound) to living tissue caused by an extrinsic agent b : a disordered psychic or behavioral state resulting from mental or emotional stress or physical injury2 : an agent, force, or mechanism that causes trauma

WORRY
Main Entry: 1wor·ry Pronunciation: 'w&r-E, 'w&-rEFunction: verbInflected Form(s): wor·ried; wor·ry·ingEtymology: Middle English worien, from Old English wyrgan; akin to Old High German wurgen to strangle, Lithuanian verzti to constricttransitive senses1 dialect British : CHOKE, STRANGLE2 a : to harass by tearing, biting, or snapping especially at the throat b : to shake or pull at with the teeth c : to touch or disturb something repeatedly d : to change the position of or adjust by repeated pushing or hauling3 a : to assail with rough or aggressive attack or treatment : TORMENT b : to subject to persistent or nagging attention or effort4 : to afflict with mental distress or agitation : make anxiousintransitive senses

WEARY
Main Entry: 1wea·ry Pronunciation: 'wir-EFunction: adjectiveInflected Form(s): wea·ri·er; -estEtymology: Middle English wery, from Old English wErig; akin to Old High German wuorag intoxicated and perhaps to Greek aOros sleep1 : exhausted in strength, endurance, vigor, or freshness2 : expressing or characteristic of weariness3 : having one's patience, tolerance, or pleasure exhausted -- used with of4 : WEARISOME- wea·ri·ly /'wir-&-lE/ adverb- wea·ri·ness /'wir-E-n&s/ noun


will go to sleep now. i hope. popped four panadols. killin' headache.

And so the war begins...

They've bombarded my phone with messages of taking "neccessary measures" if I do not return their calls... Asking where I am... Telling me to return their calls...

Called my house phone approximately one time: Mr Ho,... two times: Tricia... saying I took company's SIM card containing top bank secrets. Erm. It's a SIM card with templates of "Hi pls fax your *** to 633****** for your**** application" which i did NOT take. It's bloody on the table in the office.

Called my friend who is a resigned-part-timer in the company three to four times, asking her to "find" me and get me to call them so that they can force me to sign a strict contract. I'm feeling quite boggled. They told her I'm holding on to company property and they are going to call the police on me. Why the heck would I hold on to company property? Funny people.

My poor friend Doreen is now stuck there, in the rut. If you can see this Doreen I'm so sorry... >_< didn't wanna put you through this--working submission alone-- but I really cannot run away without you being there... please forgive me k...

Help me. The contract stated clearly "No notice by 9.15am would indicate termination", but instead of terminating me they are hunting me. literally 'hunting'. They think they're playing hide and seek. What if I had met with an accident, and was unconscious in the hospital with my handphone off? Think they'd still behave in the same manner.

Any helpful lawyers/people familiar with company law? Please advise me.

I'm an Irresponsible Person.

I've committed a sin. A worst kind of action I've never thought I'd be doing. I AWOLed from my company. Urgh. Though the guilt is digging into me, I've never felt happier leaving my company. I'd like the people in my company, if only we were not colleagues. I'll miss Danny(though he probably hates me now), Drake(he also hates me by now, i think), ChanPing(he'll be probably surprised but kinda miffed at my irresponsible behavior).

Allow me to let out all my frustrations of being in the company.

If you want me to fill up the forms and do submission, I'll do it. Don't expect me to also explain the whole application to the customer again because that's what the sales agent was supposed to do in the beginning right? Instead, when there's a complaint, it becomes my fault because I was the last contact with the customer and did not explain fully what the customer was signing up for to him/her. Shouldn't the consumer know?

If you want me to do recouriers to cover the amount of half documents, I will ask Doreen to do so. Don't ask us to give you 30 recouriers everyday when submission ends at 3 or 4pm, leaving us with only 3 hours to do so, and then expecting her to do the flowbacks you had promised to do yourself, then giving you the 30 recouriers.

If you had done the confirmation with the customers in the first place we wouldn't have had so many half-documents in the first place, and then I wouldn't have used up ALL my recourier reserves saved over Nov/Dec2004 and ended up with heavy stress over submission quota. Now you said you would do confirmation when initially I had offered to do confirmation with you, then in the end you say "too many sales" then throw half of it to us, promising that your sales people would do the recouriers, ending up with only 3 or 4 recouriers. Great going.

Anything or Everything that goes wrong, the blame is easily shifted to the Fulfillment department. How convenient. I know you all shoulder the blame for the Fulfillment Department too, but please bear in mind, I'm in that department too. I feel damn lousy whenever you all say it's my fault. Thanks for promoting me, promising me a promotion letter, promising me a raise, and not giving anything in the end.

I know it's very irresponible.

Teacher

What's wrong with wanting to be a teacher?

Pros:

-Graduate with 2 diplomas(Diploma in Consumer Science And Technology with Diploma in Home Economics Education.)

-All tuition fees to Temasek Poly and NIE covered by MOE(meaning Diplomas for free.)

-During studying don't have to look for part-time job to sustain handphone bills, electricity bills, transport fees, materialistic needs(monthly bursary of $800 during 1st 3 years of course. 4th year while in NIE will become salaried with yr-end bonus + cpf)

-After graduation don't have to worry about no job with silly diplomas on hand.(5 year bond teaching at Secondary Level, also get to undertake CCA-yay!)

-Schools have school holidays!

Cons:

-Sell my life to MOE till I'm 29.

-if they don't continue contract after I'm 29, where do I go?

-teenager-issues, might be hard to handle. might teach them unneccessary profanities if provoked.

-if school is lousy will also be v.disappointed

-low pay? long hours? but I wanna get married! >_<


--------------------------------------------

any other ideas/comments? please help me out here.

Wild Thoughts

Have decided would be v.g to be a teacher! Hurrah! seen way out of miserable life. will carry out plans asap.

mother does not like my idea. wants to check it out with my teacher-turned-normal-civilian-office-worker aunt on why she left MOE first. asks me to hold my decision for one more week. Urks. Feels that is bad idea to hold on one more week. body is protesting against it. have feeling will faint tomorrow.

friday nite meeting weilin and doris for weilin's small birthday gathering. wonder if will have enough resources to go out with them. listening to Ayumi now. sigh. really tired. of overall outcome of life. haha.

decided want to wake up at 6am to go for early morning shower. hopes heater will not break down suddenly leaving me in cold water early in the morning for will scream out loud waking up whole household. also hope to catch last 10 minutes footage of 'Bridget Jones's Diary' before going out. love to see Colin Firth(Mark Darcy, I mean.) kissing her. yummy. wish had boyfriend who was so much taller than me and kissing me like that, heh. so romantic indeed.

ok, enough dirty thoughts, have GOT to go to bed or will die like today.(today woke up 7.30am and was almost late despite $20 spent on cab-plus-ERP-after-20-mins-heartstopping-wait-for-cab)

Re-entry!

Yes! have finished Bridget Jones: The Edge of Reason novel. Kinda cute. Loved the ending. Hope the movie is modelled after the book :P Mark Daaaarcy!

Danny decided to step in on my fulfillment. Realised courier services has been cheating small money out of company. Furious. confronts drake and drake steps into my area demanding to know what I told Danny. Was staring blankly at him when Danny steps in saying loudly "leave her out of this lah, Drake. Wendy, stop wasting time and get on with my fulfillment!" -_-"

what da hell.... (but kinda happy he stopped Drake from forcing me into saying nothing's wrong with the courier service.)

anywayz. Got home at 10.20, sat down at the computer and surprise! Adrian messages me on MSN. Greetings and I realise Adrian is actually a child-trainer. also discovers that adrian is very hap-pen-ning man.

I first knew Adrian at a motivation session at L88 when we were supposed to be various animals looking for our other half. Apparently he's the male duck. O_O wait.. or was it another animal... anyways. He was my other half in the game, and we got to know each other from there. then we exchanged no.s and once met up at night to chat. Can't remember much, only remember that he has nice car. heh.

Will be meeting him up for drinks this sat nite! very tired. gonna go sleep now. but first, gotta listen to "Out of Reach" first.....

The DVD I've been waiting for!

Bridget Jones: The Edge of Reason

Release Date: 03/22/2005 (PREORDER) <-- eeks! can't wait...

It's here! It's here! *Excited*

anyway, broke down at work, damn stressed. Hate it. :(

Dad and Mum both egging me to quit. Both egging me to go back to study. Me also eager to go back to study. Question is, what to study? If leen is right, I may have to try for Mass Communications. I rejected the one at Ngee Ann before, so probably gonna reflect badly if I go back and apply. :(

So confused. Any ideas, anybody?

Monday Hues

Reached office at nine sharp. Rena was already calling my handphone when I was standing at the lift lobby waiting for the lift. Eeks. Talk about phobia.

Danny was really cold to me today. So sad. He even snapped at me.

All I can say about today's submission is "Bollocks to you, too!" Totally screwed. Only had "lunch" at 4.45pm. Crazy huh. Left office at 9pm. Hopefully Tuesday I can leave earlier.

Couldn't resist buying "Bridget Jones's: The Edge of Reason" today. Couldn't resist the $4.95 Love Actually VCD also. I have a weak will. Durrrrr. People who've read Bridget Jones's Diary would find my style slowly growing more and more like it. This happens when day and night everything and anything is about Bridget Jones and Colin Firth. am totally nuts about him! *swoon*

Mom is getting strange. Just the other day, she hung the clothes(wet, mind you) in the master bedroom. Dad's kinda worried. He dislikes me working till late hours and going out early in the morning. Think am gonna start looking at alternatives solutions. If unable to avoid resigning then so be it.

May they screw me.

sigh.

I hate getting reprimanded for no concrete reason. Will comfort myself with lots of Colin Firth. Am gonna watch "what a girl wants" DVD so I can see him in his hippy look. dum dee dum.

Bridget Jones

Buying books just ain't worth the money for me. Have already finished Bridget Jones's Diary. I always had this weakness for happy endings, ha! Considering buying Edge of Reason already. Can't afford to, though. I love love love watching the DVD~

Have feeling am going to die tomorrow at work. Reason-Either killed by managers for not hitting quota for submissions OR Dying from exhaustion. I just don't wanna lose this Sunday-feeling. I love the Sunday feeling because it means I can indulge in my OWN interests instead of the COMPANY's interests.

I hope maybe one day I can work in an industry where MY interests intertwine with my COMPANY's interests.

Out Of Reach

-Performed by : Gabrielle-

Knew the signs
Wasn't right
I was stupid for a while

Swept away by you
And now I feel like a fool

So confused,
My heart's bruised
Was I ever loved by you?

Out of reach,
so far
I never had your heart
Out of reach,
Couldn't see
We were never
Meant to be

Catch myself
From despair
I could drown
If I stay here

Keeping busy
everyday
I know I will be OK
But I was

So confused,
My heart's bruised
Was I ever loved by you?

Out of reach,
so far
I never had your heart
Out of reach,
Couldn't see
We were neverMeant to be

So much hurt,
So much pain
Takes a while
To regain
What is lost inside

And I hope that in time,
You'll be out of my mind
And I'll be over you
But now I'm

So confused,
My heart's bruised
Was I ever loved by you?

Out of reach,
So far
I never had your heart
Out of reach,
Couldn't see
We were neverMeant to be

Out of reach,
So far
You never gave your heart
In my reach,
I can see
There's a life out there
For me

Sick.

Vomitted this morning. Feeling sick.

Got to office at 11am. Danny's -almost- ignoring me. I still can't believe he msged me "I'm disgusted". Danny seems to have this control over my emotions with his words. He can make me feel euphoric, yet he can make me lose my appetite for an entire day. Amazing huh?

Bought Bridget Jones's Diary(finally!), and bought the soundtrack as well. am becoming an official Bridget Addict. Unbelieveable. Woo. I feel woozy. Been floating around. Don't feel like working at all. Didn't do much today either. Just basically nagged every customer I could get to that we're going down on them tomorrow. To them, I mean.

Filled out whatever forms Sharol threw me. I'll always feel bad if I do badly in work, but this sickly feeling (plus the medicine) is making me feel like I wouldn't give a damn if they shouted at me tomorrow. Got to be serious. Got to be serious. (it's raining men, hallelujah~)

I am really feeling shitty. Loving Colin Firth. He's so gorgeous. Wonder if anyone can see his picture here.

Sigh. Gotta work tomorrow. Can't leave Doreen to die there alone. Plus they'll definitely bomb her if I'm not there. Then she'll hate me. For leaving her to die alone.